i want to write about rotten food.
i sometimes grab garbage and eat it. i hate that i do that. i think i want to. yuck. myself. out so. i. grab the grossest thing i can. find and i stuff it in my mouth.
i find myself in front of my. neighbors trash can. i dive in to drag out the plastic bag full of trash. i rip open the plastic bag. i want to stop but i cant. i feel inside the bag looking for something. sweet. but i only find greasy meat. i cant eat that but the thing. under it is bread. i can eat bread. i. shove it into my mouth. it tastes like garbage. i. hate the. taste but i. cant. spit it. out. my mouth muscles dont. do that movement
the trash can raiding was becoming a. pattern. then i. was eating garbage one afternoon and i. heard. my mom coming.
mom came and yelled at me. she had an idea how. to get me to. stop. she went inside and found the malva the. little bottle that she used to stop freya from sucking her thumb. she went back to the trash can and painted the top of the trash bag. then she painted my mouth and. my fingers. it tasted awful. really really. terrible. the worst thing. i have ever had in my mouth. but it worked. i have eaten. garbage since then. but. i have not gone across. the road to get it.
PICA : A craving for something that is not normally regarded as nutritive, such as dirt, clay, paper, or chalk. (…)Pica is also seen as a symptom in several neurobiological disorders, including autism and Tourette’s syndrome… (Medicinenet.com)